Future Parenting Worries

“You think you’re worried now, just wait until baby arrives!”: you have no idea how many times I have heard this in the last seven months. As though I don’t already spend my nights wondering what sort of parent I’ll be or what sort of child I’ll be raising. Some of my concerns are probably quite mild “what will I do if baby gets nappy rash?!” or “what if pottermore places baby in Gryffindor?!” – you just never know! However, in the name of being open about more serious parenting concerns, I’ve decided to write down my five biggest worries for the years ahead:

 

1. Asthma: What if baby has asthma? The condition appears to run in my family, a very strong percentage of us have breathing issues. My concern over baby’s lungs is one of the reasons why we’re looking so seriously into breastfeeding (alongside Mr Robinson’s eczema). If this becomes a reality, then at least I’ll be in a good position to spot the symptoms and manage the treatment. However, by the time I was nine, my own asthma was terribly out of control and I spent a lot of time either unwell or in hospital. In my teenage years, my school attendance averaged 60%, and I’m aware that my own academic success was mostly down to luck.
2. Autism: What if baby has autism? This might sound like something that is quite rare, or that I’m being paranoid in some way by worrying about this already. That is, until I say that my sister has Asperger’s Syndrome and Mr Robinson’s sister has very severe autism. As a couple, we have very different experiences due to the varying natures of the Autistic Spectrum, but it was something that made us reluctant to even begin trying for a child. It will, most likely, plague our experience until we see for ourselves that baby is meeting various milestones successfully. To be clear: autism isn’t some sort of terrible condition, our child would still have a great life, but I won’t downplay the difficulties we would face as parents in this position.
3. Anxiety: What if baby develops anxiety or, worse, is impacted by MY anxiety? Like asthma, anxiety is another condition that plagues my family. I’m very aware that many of my Mum’s issues with anxiety have been passed on to my sister and I. For the last few months, I’ve wondered how I’ll manage my anxiety in a way that reduces the impact on my child. It’s something I’ll be researching and getting advice on as we progress through this journey.
4. Dentist: How can I make sure my child doesn’t become scared of the dentist? I have a real fear of the dentist even though I can remember quite good experiences in my early childhood. Mr Robinson is terrified of the dentist, I’m not sure he’s even currently registered with one. I’d like our little one to have a healthy relationship with dental and medical care so that they will never feel scared of approaching these services in the future if they need to. I suppose in the long run being scared of the dentist is so common that I shouldn’t worry over it but it does play on my mind!
5. Bullying: What if my child is a bully or is being bullied? Both myself and Mr Robinson have been on the receiving end of bullying and it’s a genuine concern in our household. Having experienced very vividly what bullying can do to people and the lack of support offered in schools, I don’t quite know how I’ll be able to approach this with our own child. However, I worry even more about our child being the one that does the bullying. I remember a lot of the children that were the most callous and sneaky, were children who had no issues at home, came from loving and stable backgrounds, yet lacked empathy, sympathy, and kindness. I’m hoping we’ll be able to overcome this with early life lessons on being a decent human being!!